10) My four-year-old is deathly afraid of the dark.
9) Approximately 99.7% of the rides at Disneyworld involve darkness.
8) My two-year-old can officially sleep through explosions and gunfire (albeit fake gunfire…still REALLY loud.)
7) The same two-year-old can insist on being carried, then refuse to be touched…all in the span of five minutes.
6) I have biceps of steel. (If I didn’t before, I do after carrying aforementioned two-year-old all over creation…Walt Disney’s creation.)
5) All those people coughing at the airport, on the bus, on the monorail, in line at the rides…They’re sharing the love. You just don’t know it until approximately day five. Just pick up the Robitussin on arrival.
4) My four-year-old hates crowded dance floors. Disney characters don’t sweeten the deal.
3) My two-year-old can’t be pried off the dance floor with a crowbar…even after the Disney characters call it a night.
2) You should always check if anyone needs to go poo-poo BEFORE getting in the giant line. Asking if anyone needs to “go potty” won’t suffice…You must be SPECIFIC.
1) Despite it all…It really is a magical place. And yes, we’ll do it again someday. The smiles on my kids’ faces are worth every (exhausting) minute. Now I’m going to bed…